Bouncing Back

It's been long over a month since I posted last... this is long over-due, but so are a lot of things in my life as of lately. In my dry spell from my writing, I unfortunately must say that I've had some dry spells in my prayer, praise, worship, and faith Life. Now, I'm normally not the type of person to write about my own personal issues, but this time is different. I have a love for Christ that is not wavering, however there are times when I don't feel like praising. I realize that sounds terrible, but there are those times when I feel like my heart isn't in it, so why bother? The other day I sat down to read my Bible, and decided I was tired, and didn't feel like it. Many of you, those of you that read this, are probably curious why I'm calling myself out on this? It's because I don't want to give a facade of being the most devote, upstanding Christian that exists. I fall every single day, I fail on a regular basis, and I come up short in meeting the expectations of my brothers and sisters in Christ, as well as Christ himself. What I realize though, is that there is grace in knowing that He is merciful and He expects us to fall. In Isaiah (not sure where, around Chapters 42-52 I think) It talks about how false praise is something that disgusts God. He doesn't want us to do things because we think it "adds to our tally". It's supposed to be something we do out of love for Him.

I. Am. His. Son.

I am a child of God. I am no longer going to pretend to be a perfect Christian, I am someone that falls, but thankfully I will never fall from the grace of God. Even when you aren't practicing the way you are called to, He still loves you. I fully believe that God knows our hearts, He knows when we yearn for Him, and He knows, long before we do, that we will experience periods of doubt, of confusion, distrust, and misunderstanding. Yet, He never leaves. He is ever-present, He is beside us every step of the way. I know the "footprints" thing has become slightly cliche due to the over-the-top worldy spin that has been put on it. I think many look at it as a decoration, just like the Cross, but the "footprints in the sand" is truth. Just as the Cross is. I have a challenge to you, sit down, for 20 minutes, turn on some praise and worship music, clothes your eyes and pray. Pray to be broken, or healed, lifted or grounded, steadied or wavered, strengthened or weakened. Whatever it is you need, ask Him for it. And then wait, wait for His answer, but be cautioned, you may not recieve it while sitting on the floor, or driving to work. There are many things that 3 years ago at 18, I prayed with earnest for, and I still haven't recieved an answer, or at least a recognizeable one. I still pray for things I haven't received answers on, and on certain days I become discouraged, but then I remember a verse shared with me by a new friend: Isaiah 25:1

"O Lord, You are my God
I will exalt and praise your name
For in perfect faithfulness
You have done marvelous things
things planned long ago"

God will provide everything I need, as He will for you. Everything that has happened, and will happen, was planned long before we came to be. Me, writing this, is something that God knew would happen, He placed the exact conversations, thoughts, emotions, and passion for you, in my heart today, in order for me to write this. I know this may be unconventional, but if you are reading this, what's written below is my prayer for you. I won't promise to pray this everyday, because I know I would fail you, but I will try my hardest:

Father, God
I ask that you break my friend
Tear them to pieces, so that you may reassemble them in a way that is glorifying to you
Make them feel whole, give them the strength to move forward
to feel your presence, to call your name
Lord, give me the determination, and the heart
to provide everything I can for each of these people
To pray, listen, love, and guide
to the best of my ability, and allow them to hold me accountable
You know our hearts, Father
You know our thoughts, our souls, our plans
and He has plans in store for us
Allow us to be faithful, and trusting in your plans
and know that you will provide everything we need with time.
We love you so much, Father
thank you for your Grace, and your mercy.
In your name, Amen.

If you're reading this, know that I love you!

Grace and Peace