7.06.2011

Getting back to me...

So the description of this blog is "Life as it happens" roughly... well, Life has been happening, in quick and crazy ways but I am excited about every moment of it. I am so thankful for the direction God is taking my life... so this blog is going to be very random, and very much about everything He is doing an teaching me. First things first, the last few times I've blogged I have talked about the uncertainty in my life, and while some of that still exists God has been answering prayers left and right. Starting with redefining who I am. When I went to Ethiopia my life seemed to be a mess, I was confused about life, love, faith, and future. Coming back to Indiana was not my first choice, but I realize now that it was His purpose not mine. I have rekindled some old friendships and strengthened many others. I am so thankful for the friends God has placed in my life, especially those that have been so consistent during the bad times throughout the years. I truly feel at home in this town, and while I still struggle with missing Lexington and desiring to move to Nashville, I realize that without this place, without these people I wouldn't be who I am now. I feel as though I am back to my roots, to the person I was supposed to be all along. I feel like me, and that is a feeling I have been missing for quite some time... I finally landed a job. This last two weeks has been an absolute whirlwind of emotion and faith. I got turned down after one interview, and I was struggling. Yet, God provided an opportunity that starts in a few days and I am so thankful to be back at IBT for a while. I made my deadline, I had a job by July 1st and that is truly God working in awesome ways. I can't wait to begin this position and see where God leads me next. Laughter is no longer scarce in my laugh. I have laughed more in the last 4 weeks than I have in a very long time. Late nights with great friends, text conversations about things that make no sense, and every moment spent with the people that know me better than anyone else have improved my quality of life. I am experiencing quality and quantity of time with those I love more than ever before, and it is even at the point that I don't have enough time to spend with all of those people. My heart has been filled with desire for the last few weeks to make some changes in different relationships and God has provided. I am so blessed to be in the place that I am. I wake up every day even more thankful and excited for what God will do next, it absolutely blows my mind. When I got home, my focus was on God, and Brad. I became selfish very quickly, and the two people I love most suffered for that. I am so thankful I have the understanding and caring parents that God gave me. I am blessed beyond words to have my Mom and Pops by my side every step of the way, guiding and directing me, and teaching me things, by the grace of God. I guess I never took the time to realize how well my parents truly listen to God, and how well I need to listen to Him and them. Granted we still have our differences, but seeing the love they share with each other, and the love they show my sister and I gives me hope that I can one day be the man, husband, and father God is calling me to be, one that will be close, yet fall short of all that my Pops has been to our family. I still struggle with the things that are lost. My house at 431 Union Street, the parts of my childhood that went with that, my grandparents, friends that have come and gone, and the things I let slip away. But God has blessed me ten times over, and I couldn't be more thankful for that. Sitting here listening to music and the song playing says it all... "I'm what I am, and I'm what I'm not, and I'm sure happy with what I've got, I live to love and laugh a lot, and that's all I need...I've never wanted nothin' more" I am moved by the power of God's grace. Stay tuned viewers, there is so much more to come... some of which is already in my heart but not yet ready for the world... or facebook to hear. Grace and Peace, B

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