Last night, as I was driving home... I started thinking about what today was going to look like. I started to anticipate the pain that would come as soon as I watched the clock change from 11:59 to Midnight, starting another day... and realizing that another year had passed. It took 6 years to write my first post about what happened 7 years ago today. After I did that, I realized how freeing it was... I realized the healing power in doing that. So in order to try and heal just a little bit more, and to pay tribute to what is now lost, here I sit. In front of a screen, attempting to put all my thoughts and emotions into so few words. I laid down in bed around 10:30 last night... and watched all 90 minutes tick by on my clock. Instead of trying to sleep, and more so to avoid the nightmares, I laid there praying that this year it wouldn't hurt so much. I looked at pictures of the house from the days that followed the fire. It still seems so surreal. I drove by 431 Union Street this morning, just long enough that I could catch a glimpse of what used to stand there. It's funny, because as each year passes, it gets more real every time I drive by...
I have spent a collective 20 years living in Hope, Indiana. There was a time when I thought I would never return to live here full-time after college... I was wrong. Yet looking back on where I was, where I've been, and where I'm going, I'm thankful for the time I have here... because most likely, it won't be where I live forever. There is one scar from growing up here that hasn't healed completely. December 19th, 2005. That's the day my world came crashing down around me, and had it not been for this small town, I don't know where I would be today. My family lost our home, our belongings, our pets, everything. It was hard to fathom. I stood there at one point listening to someone scream as we watched the fire engulf our home... then I realized the person screaming was ME. It's been seven years since we lost our home, and the 19th this year, was just as hard, if not harder than all the others. This post follows last years', in that it is just a little bit easier to write this one, than it was that one. I write about this for a reason, so that I can be reminded of what matters in life. You see, now that I am in the "real world", the reality of what today means is even clearer. It's not just the cliche "don't take things for granted" or "we are only promised today", but more than that. It's a reminder that it's not about me, or my plans, or my wants. It's about God's plan. God has used this to glorify the Kingdom, in more way than one. God has shown me a lot of things about that day in the last 7 years, most importantly, He has shown me the value of friendship and community. The core of this is carried forward from last year, because it still holds true...
I still can't believe the way people took care of us when we lost everything. People gave us clothing, places to stay, food, money, hugs, and most importantly prayers. There were people who probably had barely enough money for Christmas gifts for their own families, that replaced many of ours. People I didn't know offered money, and condolences. There are so many important people I would love to thank for what they did, but that would take a lifetime. One group of people has always stuck out in my mind when I think about that time in my life...
Before they were husbands, fathers, college graduates, teachers, coaches, adventure-seekers, insurance salesmen, businessmen, and athletic trainers, there were a special group of guys that were all part of a State Championship. Some were players, others fans in the crowd. That day was a special day though, because it was in that moment, that I saw Christ bless some very important people in my life, by helping them to achieve their dream.
A little more than 7 years ago I wrote an article that made the local newspaper. It was entitled "Before they were champions.." Take a look:
Hauser High School's boys' basketball team brought home their first state title this year, bringing a terrific season to a perfect end. Team and fans alike celebrated their happiness together. However, Hauser's team isn't one that is only there for the good times. Before they were champions, they were just a group of great guys, and true friends. On December 19th my family lost our house to a fire. We were able to salvage very little. Four days later, we were there ready to sift through the ruins and rubble and find what could be salvaged. As I got out of my car at the site of my former home, I heard more cars pull in behind me. They were members of Hauser's varsity basketball team. Not only are they state champions, but they are true good-hearted friends. Each one of them left practice, and drove straight to 431 Union Street. Gabe Miller, Blake Roth, Zach Fugate, Bobby Jolliff, Bryce Mize, Justin Baute, Brandon Barker, Nate Long, Seth Baute, Bryan Bailey, and Ben Gearhart approached me with arms wide open and smiles on their faces. At that moment I felt the true meaning of living in a small community. Eleven young men, current and former Hauser basketball players, clad in old clothes and heavy gloves, ready to help me and my sister sift through our childhood. As we sorted through the remains, I was able to laugh and cry with the best friends a kid could ask for. Eleven kids willing to give up a day of Christmas break, to help a family in need. I stopped after about an hour of working and looked around at these 11 guys. Replaying the memories I had with each and every one of them in my house. Late nights playing video games, and all day football games in the yard, it was all very emotional for me. They were my support system, and I saw it as my duty to return the favor. I spent my Saturday supporting Gabe Miller, Blake Roth, Zach Fugate, Bobby Jolliff, Bryce Mize, Justin Baute, and Brandon Barker in their time of need, by sitting in the front row of the cheer block, cheering them on in their quest to be "Living the Dream". The others, Nate Long, Seth Baute, Bryan Bailey, and Ben Gearhart joined me in the sea of black at Conseco Fieldhouse. At the end of the game, with all the excitement buzzing, I stopped and took a moment to thank the Lord. I thanked Him for giving back to the friends that had helped me through a very hard time. The memory I have of watching my best friends win a state championship is enough to fill the void of all the things I lost in the burning of my house. It's an amazing feeling to watch the people who you've spent your entire life with, accomplish something that seemed so impossible, for so long. Congratulations to the 2006 Indiana Class 1A Boy's Basketball State Champs, and thank you for all you have done for me and my family.
I am so thankful to this day for those boys, now men. They are still some of my best friends, I have seen 3 of them get married, three are married with kids, 9 have graduated college, 1 has trained sled dogs in Alaska, and 1 of them has become my roommate. These guys have all gone on to do incredible things with their lives. They have continued to be a huge part of my life, and they will never fully comprehend what they mean to me. The other thing is, I can remember so many other people that weren't mentioned in that article because they weren't there that particular day, that should have been added to the list. My dear friend,Nick Long, wasn't able to be there that day, but I remember he came to me later and apologized for being sick. He wanted to be there but needed to rest. Just the fact that he thought there was a reason to apologize meant the world to me.Bryan Fields spent hours searching for my grandfather's 1950 Purdue class ring (pictured below) one of the few things I have left of my Grandfather, and found it amongst all the rubble. The cheerleaders, our neighbors, our friends, our family, the teachers, my soccer team, the coaches, administrators, and coworkers of my parents went above and beyond what anyone could have asked them to do.
Since that day, there are been more people that have come along that deserve to be thanked. My small group, my church, my friends from college, and my coworkers. All of them have brought joy, peace, comfort, refuge, strength, and clarity into my life in a multitude of ways. I am so thankful that God has provided such a core group of people to help me through the bad times, and to celebrate the good.
Today will be difficult, but it will also be a day of healing. Which is something I have been praying about for 7 years, and will continue to pray about for many years to come. Always Remember, and Never Forget... 431 Union Street.
12.19.2012
12.14.2012
Sadness.
This morning on my way to work, I was listening to the news and I felt burdened. Burdened by the fact that there was nothing I could do to stop the tragedies that had been taking place in our city, our state, and all over our country. I prayed for the violence to end, for there to be comfort and understanding. I prayed that kids in my community would stop taking their own lives, and start realizing that if they die to self, and are reborn in Christ... they have a reason to live. Throughout the day I have thought about this off and on as I have read the news periodically at work. I didn't think it could get any worse... then I came back from a company Christmas Luncheon to this headline:
"Horror Unfolds at Conn. Elementary School" (Yahoo! News)
Really? An elementary school? Is this what society has become... walking into a school of Kindergarten-Fourth grade students and shooting, as though it were a game? I'm sick to my stomach, my heart aches, and I'm at a loss for what to do. The last number I saw was 18 children dead. Dead. 27 people total. How do the demonic animals that committed these horrendous acts not realize that children are our future. Those kids they killed, were future CEO's, Pastors, Teachers, Husbands, Wives, Mothers, Fathers, Leaders... Their actions not only destroyed and ended lives in a Connecticut community, but damaged the hope we have in humanity across the country. As I sit here, I move from heartbroken to angry. I just want to know what in the hell these people were thinking. Then I am reminded that they weren't. They allowed their lives to be directed by the enemy, by a lost, broken, horrific, falsity that children in an elementary school deserved to die. Instead of keeping children safe, they stripped away their lives. Lives that were too young.
Pray. Pray for the families of the victims, pray for the community, pray for the school staff and the children that survived, pray for elementary schools across the country, pray for our country... but also, pray for the gunmen and their families. Pray that the families of the men that did this can find peace and comfort in Christ, and realization that had their family member found himself basking in the Holy Spirit, this wouldn't have happened. I have faith that the community of Newtown, Connecticut will find healing in the years to come. I have faith in that because of what it says in Psalm 34:18 "The Lord is close to the brokenhearted, he rescues those whose spirits are crushed".
I find my hope in that verse alone. Prayers to all involved, Lord provide comfort and healing in the midst of everything that has happened.
Grace and Peace
"Horror Unfolds at Conn. Elementary School" (Yahoo! News)
Really? An elementary school? Is this what society has become... walking into a school of Kindergarten-Fourth grade students and shooting, as though it were a game? I'm sick to my stomach, my heart aches, and I'm at a loss for what to do. The last number I saw was 18 children dead. Dead. 27 people total. How do the demonic animals that committed these horrendous acts not realize that children are our future. Those kids they killed, were future CEO's, Pastors, Teachers, Husbands, Wives, Mothers, Fathers, Leaders... Their actions not only destroyed and ended lives in a Connecticut community, but damaged the hope we have in humanity across the country. As I sit here, I move from heartbroken to angry. I just want to know what in the hell these people were thinking. Then I am reminded that they weren't. They allowed their lives to be directed by the enemy, by a lost, broken, horrific, falsity that children in an elementary school deserved to die. Instead of keeping children safe, they stripped away their lives. Lives that were too young.
Pray. Pray for the families of the victims, pray for the community, pray for the school staff and the children that survived, pray for elementary schools across the country, pray for our country... but also, pray for the gunmen and their families. Pray that the families of the men that did this can find peace and comfort in Christ, and realization that had their family member found himself basking in the Holy Spirit, this wouldn't have happened. I have faith that the community of Newtown, Connecticut will find healing in the years to come. I have faith in that because of what it says in Psalm 34:18 "The Lord is close to the brokenhearted, he rescues those whose spirits are crushed".
I find my hope in that verse alone. Prayers to all involved, Lord provide comfort and healing in the midst of everything that has happened.
Grace and Peace
12.03.2012
Faith like a Child
It's the most wonderfuuuuuulllll tiiiiiiiime of the year!!!! That was me singing, lucky for you, you only had to read it, not hear it. So we are quickly approaching the Christmas season, in fact, for some people, it began a week ago after Thanksgiving ended. I love "The Holidays" as we call them, because they are filled with family, friends, food, fellowship, but most importantly, one Holiday in particular is incredibly vital to my Faith. Christmas. The day that CHRIST was born. Now, you may be wondering why this post is coming so early, it's only December 3rd and it's 70 degrees outside... not really very "Christmasy" (yes, I added a "Y" to make that an adjective, don't judge me!) Here's the thing though, last night really set the tone for the Christmas season for myself, and many others, last night, Community Church of Columbus had their Children's Christmas Program. It was Legen...... wait for it........ DARY. That's right, I said it... it was legendary, and here's why.
Those.Kids.Rocked.
The kids in the program were great. To use a bit of alliteration they were absolutely adorable, completely cute, and terrifically thespian (even though 98% of them probably don't know what a Thespian is, for that matter 68% of you are probably "googling" it right now). Honestly, the kids last night, nailed every bit of that program. It was funny, heartwarming, and I'm almost positive that not one kid messed up their lines. However, the thing I liked the most, was seeing how excited they were to participate in a musical that was directly focused on Christ and the importance of the true meaning of Christmas. I have to say, it was exactly what I needed. I often get down-trodden during the winter months. Generally from the end of November to the beginning of March it's dark when I leave the house, and dark when I get home. It can be depressing, especially when all the distractions and pressures of life keep you from focusing on the source of our Joy, God the Father. I'll be honest and completely transparent... I wanted to cry last night. More than once my eyes welled up with tears, ready to unleash the flood gates because it just absolutely overwhelmed me (in a good way) to hear such tiny voices preaching such a HUGE message. It was even more special because these were kids I had taught in Tuesday Connection and Sunday School. Kids that I have gotten to see grow up, even just in the last year. While I was sitting there taking this all in, one scene in particular started... and out fluttered Kate. A little more than a year ago I wrote a blog about Kate called Big Answers Come in Small Packages... Kate is this vibrant, amazing little girl that has been battling cancer most of her life. She has moved me to tears on numerous occasions, but nothing as powerful as last night. Last night, Kate was a ballerina. She came dancing out onto the stage, and was absolutely glowing with excitement. I could tell Kate loved every minute of it, and it made me stop and think. How often do I complain throughout my day, to people, on the phone, on Facebook/Twitter, etc. We complain all the time, and yet, despite eating one too many cookies occasionally, I'm healthy. Yet, sometimes I act like I have the whole world resting on my shoulders... then there's Kate. A little girl that has fought one of the most terrible illnesses known, and yet she's dancing for Jesus. Absolutely loving life. Kate reminded me last night what's important in life, and that in order to truly live... I need to find a way to dance for Jesus each and every day. Just like Kate.
Child.Like.Faith.
Once again, a big answer came in the form of a small package. The kids reminded me how important it is to focus on Christ, and the joy of His birth during the CHRISTmas season. It brought about the start of a period of restoration, which is something I have been praying for, for quite some time now. I am so thankful for all the kids in our church, and for the staff and youth that helped make last night's performance so special. I am thankful that we have parents in our body that are teaching their children about the Father, The Son, and The Holy Spirit. I am thankful for childlike faith. (Excerpt from Big Answers) Luke says in chapter 18 verses 16&17-- 16 Then Jesus called for the children and said to the disciples, “Let the children come to me. Don’t stop them! For the Kingdom of God belongs to those who are like these children. 17 I tell you the truth, anyone who doesn’t receive the Kingdom of God like a child will never enter it.” If we have faith like a child, if we receive the Kingdom as a child does, we'll inherit it. A child? Someone so small, young, naive, inexperienced at life... no, someone that has yet to be corrupted by this world, someone who still understands the fundamental parts of faith, that isn't bitter at the world yet... someone like Kate.and the rest of the children at CCC.
Grace and Peace,
Those.Kids.Rocked.
The kids in the program were great. To use a bit of alliteration they were absolutely adorable, completely cute, and terrifically thespian (even though 98% of them probably don't know what a Thespian is, for that matter 68% of you are probably "googling" it right now). Honestly, the kids last night, nailed every bit of that program. It was funny, heartwarming, and I'm almost positive that not one kid messed up their lines. However, the thing I liked the most, was seeing how excited they were to participate in a musical that was directly focused on Christ and the importance of the true meaning of Christmas. I have to say, it was exactly what I needed. I often get down-trodden during the winter months. Generally from the end of November to the beginning of March it's dark when I leave the house, and dark when I get home. It can be depressing, especially when all the distractions and pressures of life keep you from focusing on the source of our Joy, God the Father. I'll be honest and completely transparent... I wanted to cry last night. More than once my eyes welled up with tears, ready to unleash the flood gates because it just absolutely overwhelmed me (in a good way) to hear such tiny voices preaching such a HUGE message. It was even more special because these were kids I had taught in Tuesday Connection and Sunday School. Kids that I have gotten to see grow up, even just in the last year. While I was sitting there taking this all in, one scene in particular started... and out fluttered Kate. A little more than a year ago I wrote a blog about Kate called Big Answers Come in Small Packages... Kate is this vibrant, amazing little girl that has been battling cancer most of her life. She has moved me to tears on numerous occasions, but nothing as powerful as last night. Last night, Kate was a ballerina. She came dancing out onto the stage, and was absolutely glowing with excitement. I could tell Kate loved every minute of it, and it made me stop and think. How often do I complain throughout my day, to people, on the phone, on Facebook/Twitter, etc. We complain all the time, and yet, despite eating one too many cookies occasionally, I'm healthy. Yet, sometimes I act like I have the whole world resting on my shoulders... then there's Kate. A little girl that has fought one of the most terrible illnesses known, and yet she's dancing for Jesus. Absolutely loving life. Kate reminded me last night what's important in life, and that in order to truly live... I need to find a way to dance for Jesus each and every day. Just like Kate.
Child.Like.Faith.
Once again, a big answer came in the form of a small package. The kids reminded me how important it is to focus on Christ, and the joy of His birth during the CHRISTmas season. It brought about the start of a period of restoration, which is something I have been praying for, for quite some time now. I am so thankful for all the kids in our church, and for the staff and youth that helped make last night's performance so special. I am thankful that we have parents in our body that are teaching their children about the Father, The Son, and The Holy Spirit. I am thankful for childlike faith. (Excerpt from Big Answers) Luke says in chapter 18 verses 16&17-- 16 Then Jesus called for the children and said to the disciples, “Let the children come to me. Don’t stop them! For the Kingdom of God belongs to those who are like these children. 17 I tell you the truth, anyone who doesn’t receive the Kingdom of God like a child will never enter it.” If we have faith like a child, if we receive the Kingdom as a child does, we'll inherit it. A child? Someone so small, young, naive, inexperienced at life... no, someone that has yet to be corrupted by this world, someone who still understands the fundamental parts of faith, that isn't bitter at the world yet... someone like Kate.and the rest of the children at CCC.
Grace and Peace,
11.29.2012
How Christian Are You?
I wrote an entirely different post yesterday to put up for this week. It can wait until Monday. This morning, being the news junkie that I am, I was checking into some headlines on my Summly App, which allows you to customize what kind of news you want to see. Naturally, two of my key words that Summly searches for in the news each day are Jesus and Christianity. So, as I was perusing the headlines under my Christianity tab, I came across this little gem.... "Christianity Quiz Shows 1 in 4 Christians are Not Very Christian" (absolutely mind-blowing how great the title of that article is). In the name of research, I decided to read the summary of the article, then the article in it's entirity. Now, some of you may be sitting there thinking "Well they suckered you" but you would be wrong. I only visited the website and looked at the quiz as fodder for this blog. Let me just share what the disclaimer says:
"The Christianity Quiz is a 10 question self-assessment to gauge how well your daily thoughts and actions reflect the teachings of Jesus Christ. It is not intended to pass judgment on you. We are aware that no quiz can assess the complete Christian experience, nor can it peer into your heart as God can. And so, this Christianity Quiz is not intended to say whether you are or are not a Christian. It’s not intended to say whether you are a good or bad person. However, when taken for what it is, it can be used as a reflection of your current level of engagement with your Christian faith. If you are a new Christian, you would expect your score to increase over time as you continually seek to know God and His ways more and more. And you should expect your score to increase over time as you submit yourself to the Lordship of Jesus Christ, obeying his teachings. If you have been a Christian for a longer time, you might expect your score to fluctuate up or down over time as you renew your commitment or find yourself drifting away. Every Christian goes through times where they feel more or less connected to God, and this quiz can generally gauge where you are at right now. Good luck on the Christianity Quiz and let us know if you have any feedback on it using our About > Contact Us form."
I almost don't know where to begin...so I highlighted the parts that bothered me the most, let's start with the fact that it's only 10 questions. 10. Ten. 1/10 of 100. 10 questions. That's it. Apparently the valuation of your faith can be measured by 10 simple questions, because, well, being a Christian is just that easy. Wrong.Wrong.Wrong. The first issue I have with this, is that 10 questions on a website cannot assess my heart, there's absolutely no way. The second big issue with the 10 questions is, who on Earth has the authority or audacity to think that they have the authority to create these 10 questions. Where in the Bible does it say, "In order to know whether you are following Christ, answer 10 questions created by some over-zealous, self-proclaimed prophet". I'm not saying the website itself does not have any validity or a mission worth talking about.. to be honest, at this point I haven't taken much time to research the rest of the website because this is about this absurd Quiz. That, despite that it claims to let you gauge where you are right now, is in no way judging you. Even though the end results range from "Far From Christ" to "Spiritually Mature". I for one, am confident that an online quiz can accurately assess my spiritual maturity.. because, you know, there's no way that you could nullify the accuracy by answering in a way that you believe will give you a better score. I did my best to not read too much into the questions (and by that I mean, try to answer in a way that would skew the results) and went through all 10 questions. I gave strong consideration to taking a "screen-shot" of each question, but figured there might be some copyright infringement or something there... so I only took a screen shot of the first one:
That's right, this quiz is only for Christians. and by clicking that little button, you are affirming that you are a Christian. It's like an online version of the Sinner's Prayer... So, after affirming my salvation by clicking a button, I started the quiz (against my better judgement). The questions are things like "How often do you read your Bible and/or spend quiet time with The Lord", and "When someone recklessly cuts you off in traffic, you respond by:". Now, I'm not saying these questions are not valid questions, and can't serve as accountability if they address things you struggle with. However, I also don't believe that answering these 10 questions can provide and accurate summation of where I am in my relationship with Christ. Again, for the sake of this blog alone and because I fully believe in transparency between myself and my readers, let me provide my results in the next image:
Go ahead and applaude me, I'm a "Good Christian". That's right, as you sit there in your jealousy, I am basking in my achievment of being a "Good Christian"... which means I will stop here and coast until I reach eternity!!! Here's the real problem, I think they got it backwards. First off, considering I know myself better than the internet does, I would say, unfortunately, I struggle more with truly living as a Christian outwardly than I do inwardly. Which begs the question, if we are "living as a good Christian outwardly" but not inwardly (as the quiz says) does that really make me a "Good Christian". If I am not inwardly seeking Christ the way I should, but outwardly I allow the world to think that I am... aren't I decieving the world? Aren't I causing my brothers to stumble by pretending like I am someone I am not? I understand that actions speak louder than words, so living that way outwardly is extremely important. However, I also fully believe in transparency, and in order to be held accountable, my brothers and sisters in Christ need to know what I'm struggling with. Living one way behind closed doors, and another way out in public is hypocritical-- I don't feel like that makes me a "Good Christian" at all.
Maybe I'm reading too much into this. Maybe you disagree with me... I want to know your thoughts. I don't have all the answers, I just have my reactions and opinions. To me, my faith and relationship with Christ absolutely CAN NOT be measured by 10 questions. To be honest, I think this can create even more hypocrisy within Christianity. As long as you are living outwardly in a way that shows you love Jesus, you are a "Good Christian"... NO! Not at all! What makes me a Christian is my belief, intentional relationship, worship, praise, conviction, faith.. if I'm living a life of sin when no one is looking, I'm not living a life that Jesus calls us too. We too often preach this "fluffy" Gospel, that if you do certain things or think a certain way, say a Sinner's Prayer, you will recieve salvation and eternity... The Gospel is Truth, and the truth is the Gospel is convicting (or should be) to believers and offensive (or can be) to non-believers. We can't sugar-coat the gospel in order to create mass numbers of hypocritical believers, because that isn't glorifying to Christ. We can't assess people's faith with an arbitrary quiz of 10 questions that can easily be navigated to provide an "affirming" answer that we are all living as "Good Christians" by just reading into the questions and realizing what answers will get you there. In fact, I did that just now. I took the quiz a second time, answered a few question differently and was able to get the grade of "Spiritually Mature". The quiz is biased, and shaped to get you to answer certain ways. The questions are multiple choice, each of the 4 choices easily matches with one of the 4 grades. There's absolutely nothing scientific about this "assessment".
Brothers and Sisters, please don't misunderstand me... I understand the intent behind this quiz. I'm sure the creators thought they were doing people a favor! However, we will only face judgement from The Father, not from man! We can not assess our spiritual life or walk with Christ by any measure other than God's Word, the Truth, the Gospel! Please understand that the only way to truly live a life that Christ calls us to live is by following The Word and living the way Christ has called us to live. No quiz can compare to the the Gospel. Especially not one created by man. I don't recommend anyone take this quiz, therefore I refuse to link it to my blog. However, if you do decide to investigate this on your own... take it with a grain of salt, and do your best to not shape your responses to try and receive a "good grade". Most importantly, Christians, let's preach the Gospel in it's entirity. Let's show people the love of Christ, and also convict them by sharing The Truth about the way we are called to live. Let's not worry about the Gospel being offensive, let's focus on the fact that Truth is Truth.
End Rant.
Grace and Peace,
B
"The Christianity Quiz is a 10 question self-assessment to gauge how well your daily thoughts and actions reflect the teachings of Jesus Christ. It is not intended to pass judgment on you. We are aware that no quiz can assess the complete Christian experience, nor can it peer into your heart as God can. And so, this Christianity Quiz is not intended to say whether you are or are not a Christian. It’s not intended to say whether you are a good or bad person. However, when taken for what it is, it can be used as a reflection of your current level of engagement with your Christian faith. If you are a new Christian, you would expect your score to increase over time as you continually seek to know God and His ways more and more. And you should expect your score to increase over time as you submit yourself to the Lordship of Jesus Christ, obeying his teachings. If you have been a Christian for a longer time, you might expect your score to fluctuate up or down over time as you renew your commitment or find yourself drifting away. Every Christian goes through times where they feel more or less connected to God, and this quiz can generally gauge where you are at right now. Good luck on the Christianity Quiz and let us know if you have any feedback on it using our About > Contact Us form."
I almost don't know where to begin...so I highlighted the parts that bothered me the most, let's start with the fact that it's only 10 questions. 10. Ten. 1/10 of 100. 10 questions. That's it. Apparently the valuation of your faith can be measured by 10 simple questions, because, well, being a Christian is just that easy. Wrong.Wrong.Wrong. The first issue I have with this, is that 10 questions on a website cannot assess my heart, there's absolutely no way. The second big issue with the 10 questions is, who on Earth has the authority or audacity to think that they have the authority to create these 10 questions. Where in the Bible does it say, "In order to know whether you are following Christ, answer 10 questions created by some over-zealous, self-proclaimed prophet". I'm not saying the website itself does not have any validity or a mission worth talking about.. to be honest, at this point I haven't taken much time to research the rest of the website because this is about this absurd Quiz. That, despite that it claims to let you gauge where you are right now, is in no way judging you. Even though the end results range from "Far From Christ" to "Spiritually Mature". I for one, am confident that an online quiz can accurately assess my spiritual maturity.. because, you know, there's no way that you could nullify the accuracy by answering in a way that you believe will give you a better score. I did my best to not read too much into the questions (and by that I mean, try to answer in a way that would skew the results) and went through all 10 questions. I gave strong consideration to taking a "screen-shot" of each question, but figured there might be some copyright infringement or something there... so I only took a screen shot of the first one:
That's right, this quiz is only for Christians. and by clicking that little button, you are affirming that you are a Christian. It's like an online version of the Sinner's Prayer... So, after affirming my salvation by clicking a button, I started the quiz (against my better judgement). The questions are things like "How often do you read your Bible and/or spend quiet time with The Lord", and "When someone recklessly cuts you off in traffic, you respond by:". Now, I'm not saying these questions are not valid questions, and can't serve as accountability if they address things you struggle with. However, I also don't believe that answering these 10 questions can provide and accurate summation of where I am in my relationship with Christ. Again, for the sake of this blog alone and because I fully believe in transparency between myself and my readers, let me provide my results in the next image:
Go ahead and applaude me, I'm a "Good Christian". That's right, as you sit there in your jealousy, I am basking in my achievment of being a "Good Christian"... which means I will stop here and coast until I reach eternity!!! Here's the real problem, I think they got it backwards. First off, considering I know myself better than the internet does, I would say, unfortunately, I struggle more with truly living as a Christian outwardly than I do inwardly. Which begs the question, if we are "living as a good Christian outwardly" but not inwardly (as the quiz says) does that really make me a "Good Christian". If I am not inwardly seeking Christ the way I should, but outwardly I allow the world to think that I am... aren't I decieving the world? Aren't I causing my brothers to stumble by pretending like I am someone I am not? I understand that actions speak louder than words, so living that way outwardly is extremely important. However, I also fully believe in transparency, and in order to be held accountable, my brothers and sisters in Christ need to know what I'm struggling with. Living one way behind closed doors, and another way out in public is hypocritical-- I don't feel like that makes me a "Good Christian" at all.
Maybe I'm reading too much into this. Maybe you disagree with me... I want to know your thoughts. I don't have all the answers, I just have my reactions and opinions. To me, my faith and relationship with Christ absolutely CAN NOT be measured by 10 questions. To be honest, I think this can create even more hypocrisy within Christianity. As long as you are living outwardly in a way that shows you love Jesus, you are a "Good Christian"... NO! Not at all! What makes me a Christian is my belief, intentional relationship, worship, praise, conviction, faith.. if I'm living a life of sin when no one is looking, I'm not living a life that Jesus calls us too. We too often preach this "fluffy" Gospel, that if you do certain things or think a certain way, say a Sinner's Prayer, you will recieve salvation and eternity... The Gospel is Truth, and the truth is the Gospel is convicting (or should be) to believers and offensive (or can be) to non-believers. We can't sugar-coat the gospel in order to create mass numbers of hypocritical believers, because that isn't glorifying to Christ. We can't assess people's faith with an arbitrary quiz of 10 questions that can easily be navigated to provide an "affirming" answer that we are all living as "Good Christians" by just reading into the questions and realizing what answers will get you there. In fact, I did that just now. I took the quiz a second time, answered a few question differently and was able to get the grade of "Spiritually Mature". The quiz is biased, and shaped to get you to answer certain ways. The questions are multiple choice, each of the 4 choices easily matches with one of the 4 grades. There's absolutely nothing scientific about this "assessment".
Brothers and Sisters, please don't misunderstand me... I understand the intent behind this quiz. I'm sure the creators thought they were doing people a favor! However, we will only face judgement from The Father, not from man! We can not assess our spiritual life or walk with Christ by any measure other than God's Word, the Truth, the Gospel! Please understand that the only way to truly live a life that Christ calls us to live is by following The Word and living the way Christ has called us to live. No quiz can compare to the the Gospel. Especially not one created by man. I don't recommend anyone take this quiz, therefore I refuse to link it to my blog. However, if you do decide to investigate this on your own... take it with a grain of salt, and do your best to not shape your responses to try and receive a "good grade". Most importantly, Christians, let's preach the Gospel in it's entirity. Let's show people the love of Christ, and also convict them by sharing The Truth about the way we are called to live. Let's not worry about the Gospel being offensive, let's focus on the fact that Truth is Truth.
End Rant.
Grace and Peace,
B
11.16.2012
3 years in review..
It's been 17 days since I wrote my last post... and there's a reason for that.
The last 17 days I have spent reflecting on the last 3 years ago... because 3 years ago was an important day for me. On November 16th, 2009 I sat down at my computer and began typing, in very much the same way I am typing now. However, 3 years ago, I had no idea what I was going to write about. I just knew that God was moving, and I needed a place to write all of that down, so I could sort through it and hang on to it as well. The first post I ever wrote, was titled Passion and Purpose. That post was all about distinguishing between what you are passionate about and what your purpose is... and it's about the uncertaintiy of my future. Take a second (if you didn't read the whole thing) to look at this excerpt from that very first post...
"I felt that I knew what God was calling me to do, and that was the end of the story. Once again though, God has more to say, I just had to listen... I realize now that, no matter what, my studies matter... Not because I'm not going to become a missionary, or not because I'm going to work in a bank, but because I. Don't. Know. The. Answers. I have no idea if I'll become a CEO of a Fortune 500 Company, or if I'm going to work as a bank teller, or grocery store manager, or be a stay at home parent. Only. He. Knows. And tonight it was God telling me that, just as it says in Colossians 3:17 "And whatever ever you do, whether in word or deed, do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through Him".. I don't know what I'll be doing in 10 years, 5 years, 1 year, or 1 month.. I don't even know where I'll be this summer, but tonight I realized, it doesn't matter. I will go where I'm called, and do whatever it is God wants me to do, if merely to glorify Him.
My. Future. Is. Only. Known. By. Him."
Well, it's now 3 years later... and where I thought I'd be then, is not where I am now. I am thankful for that. God knew the plan all along, He led me back to the city that I grew up in, a place where I know more people than I care to some days, even though He knew my desire was to be elsewhere. God knew what He was doing, and it took me a few months after college to realize that. It's crazy to see the way God has completely transformed this blog, my relationships, my life, and my character since this journey began. I've been through heart ache, love, loss, pain, overwhelming joy, the birth of my niece and nephew, and many other things. In the last three years I have been in 16 different states, and 4 different countries. I have been involved in two very different Youth Ministries, I have worked in a restaurant, a green house, a bank, and now my current position, a global company. I graduated from college with a Bachelors degree, I have been in 3 weddings, and seen at least 16 friends get married. I got my own place, bought a new car, mended past friendships, and watch others fall to the wayside. I've laughed so hard I couldn't breath, and I've cried so long I had no tears left. However, through all the craziness, all the changes, all the distractions, all the "once-in-a-lifetime" moments... one thing has always remained constant.
Jesus.
Christ has been present through all of it. He has guided, provided and protected me through a crazy 3 years. I have been able to grow in Christ in ways that 3 years ago, I thought would never happen. He has completely transformed my life... and while that in no way means that I am no longer a sinner, it means that I am not defined by my sins, but rather my salvation. I am a prince in the Kingdom of God, I am a beloved child of God, and I am striving each day to be a man after God's own heart. If I had to pick one lesson, out of millions, that God has taught me in the last 3 years it would be: That I must put others before myself, but in that I also cannot lose sight of my own morals, values, or goals. I must love myself... even when I don't feel like I'm worthy of love. Christ died on the cross so that I could be set free from my sin, by accepting that truth into my heart, and living a life that is glorifying to Him. I don't succeed at that everday, but I'm getting better each and every step. Which makes me wonder... what will this look like on November 16, 2015...
Thank you.
Thank you to everyone that has been a part of this blog over the last 3 years. This morning I looked at the numbers... that very first post received 8 views on this site. 3/8 views were probably from my Mom. Granted I used to post these as "Facebook Notes" as well... but still. To see that I have gone from 8 views to an average of 35 views per post. That just absolutely blows my mind... Thank you for your support, for reading this blog, for the feedback: encouragement and criticism. Thank you for being a part of this journey... here's to the next 3, 5, even 10 years down the road. Today is a special day for this blogger-- and all the glory goes to God for giving me the words to write.
Grace and Peace
The last 17 days I have spent reflecting on the last 3 years ago... because 3 years ago was an important day for me. On November 16th, 2009 I sat down at my computer and began typing, in very much the same way I am typing now. However, 3 years ago, I had no idea what I was going to write about. I just knew that God was moving, and I needed a place to write all of that down, so I could sort through it and hang on to it as well. The first post I ever wrote, was titled Passion and Purpose. That post was all about distinguishing between what you are passionate about and what your purpose is... and it's about the uncertaintiy of my future. Take a second (if you didn't read the whole thing) to look at this excerpt from that very first post...
"I felt that I knew what God was calling me to do, and that was the end of the story. Once again though, God has more to say, I just had to listen... I realize now that, no matter what, my studies matter... Not because I'm not going to become a missionary, or not because I'm going to work in a bank, but because I. Don't. Know. The. Answers. I have no idea if I'll become a CEO of a Fortune 500 Company, or if I'm going to work as a bank teller, or grocery store manager, or be a stay at home parent. Only. He. Knows. And tonight it was God telling me that, just as it says in Colossians 3:17 "And whatever ever you do, whether in word or deed, do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through Him".. I don't know what I'll be doing in 10 years, 5 years, 1 year, or 1 month.. I don't even know where I'll be this summer, but tonight I realized, it doesn't matter. I will go where I'm called, and do whatever it is God wants me to do, if merely to glorify Him.
My. Future. Is. Only. Known. By. Him."
Well, it's now 3 years later... and where I thought I'd be then, is not where I am now. I am thankful for that. God knew the plan all along, He led me back to the city that I grew up in, a place where I know more people than I care to some days, even though He knew my desire was to be elsewhere. God knew what He was doing, and it took me a few months after college to realize that. It's crazy to see the way God has completely transformed this blog, my relationships, my life, and my character since this journey began. I've been through heart ache, love, loss, pain, overwhelming joy, the birth of my niece and nephew, and many other things. In the last three years I have been in 16 different states, and 4 different countries. I have been involved in two very different Youth Ministries, I have worked in a restaurant, a green house, a bank, and now my current position, a global company. I graduated from college with a Bachelors degree, I have been in 3 weddings, and seen at least 16 friends get married. I got my own place, bought a new car, mended past friendships, and watch others fall to the wayside. I've laughed so hard I couldn't breath, and I've cried so long I had no tears left. However, through all the craziness, all the changes, all the distractions, all the "once-in-a-lifetime" moments... one thing has always remained constant.
Jesus.
Christ has been present through all of it. He has guided, provided and protected me through a crazy 3 years. I have been able to grow in Christ in ways that 3 years ago, I thought would never happen. He has completely transformed my life... and while that in no way means that I am no longer a sinner, it means that I am not defined by my sins, but rather my salvation. I am a prince in the Kingdom of God, I am a beloved child of God, and I am striving each day to be a man after God's own heart. If I had to pick one lesson, out of millions, that God has taught me in the last 3 years it would be: That I must put others before myself, but in that I also cannot lose sight of my own morals, values, or goals. I must love myself... even when I don't feel like I'm worthy of love. Christ died on the cross so that I could be set free from my sin, by accepting that truth into my heart, and living a life that is glorifying to Him. I don't succeed at that everday, but I'm getting better each and every step. Which makes me wonder... what will this look like on November 16, 2015...
Thank you.
Thank you to everyone that has been a part of this blog over the last 3 years. This morning I looked at the numbers... that very first post received 8 views on this site. 3/8 views were probably from my Mom. Granted I used to post these as "Facebook Notes" as well... but still. To see that I have gone from 8 views to an average of 35 views per post. That just absolutely blows my mind... Thank you for your support, for reading this blog, for the feedback: encouragement and criticism. Thank you for being a part of this journey... here's to the next 3, 5, even 10 years down the road. Today is a special day for this blogger-- and all the glory goes to God for giving me the words to write.
Grace and Peace
10.31.2012
Do Better
At 11:30 today I received a phone call. I was sitting at my desk at work, in my Halloween costume no less, when a dear family member called to inform me that my great-grandmother, Mammaw, had passed away. Initially I was in shock, and panic. Carrie, my cousin that called, couldn't get ahold of her husband to let him know what had happened. Chris and I work in the same building, I didn't even have time to process what I had just heard... I needed to find Chris so he could call Carrie, and then go to be with her. Even after getting ahold of him, I was rushing around trying to figure out what is next. Whether I should leave work, or stay. If I had any time off, if my sister knew, how my Dad was handling things, how my grandmother was handling things... I didn't take any time to handle things myself. Then a co-worker asked me a question... they asked if she lived close by. The answer to that question was like a punch in the stomach...
A few months ago is the last time I saw Mammaw... despite being ill for quite some time, she had made it out of the house to come listen to me preach. It was that day, that she asked me to come and visit her more often... and when my sister was home to bring her with me as well. Naturally, I told her I would do both. That punch in the stomach was because... I lied. I didn't go and visit... and I didn't take Stephanie to see her when she was home in September. All I can think about is how many times she mentioned me coming to visit, and how many opportunities I never took. The sad thing is, if I wanted it to be, her house is on my way home. Some of you are probably wondering why I'm admitting this to you... well, it's part of my process. You see, as a writer I hold certain convictions that I will not only hold others accountable for the lessons God gives me, but also to hold myself accountable. In the last few weeks I have been spending a lot of time writing and talking about being intentional about being relational. I've missed the mark in a huge way. I realize that I'm not perfect, and there's no way that I can give the right amount of time to each and every relationship in my life. However, I also realize how selfish I've been lately. There's been numerous times in the last two months (and more) that I have taken the afternoon off early, and I could have easily gone to visit Mammaw. Instead I was too focused on spending time at home, at the church goofing around, or with someone that there was an interest in. I was being selfish, because those things satisfied me... and yet, I was talking to other people about being selfless...
I want to make sure everyone understands I'm not looking for sympathy through this... I'm seeking accountability. My life needs some prioritizing in order to be sure that I don't miss opportunities to tell those that I love, how much I really care. I'd like to say that it's only because I was busy, and that if there were more hours in the day I would have made it over there... but I can't say that with 100% confidence that it's true. I do know that things need to change, that I need to make more of an effort to spend time with my family, all of my family. I am at a loss for emotion at this point, minus the anger and hope. I text a brother of mine and told him what I was struggling with, the guilt and the anger.. and told him why. His response was this: "Ask the Lord for forgiveness, repent, do better. I'll pray for peace brother". It's as simple as that friends, I need to ask God for forgiveness for my selfish nature, repent from that, and do better. Do better. Two words that carry a whole lot of weight with them. I'm tired of being mediocre, and I'm tired of being selfish. It's time for me.. to do better.
Grace and Peace
A few months ago is the last time I saw Mammaw... despite being ill for quite some time, she had made it out of the house to come listen to me preach. It was that day, that she asked me to come and visit her more often... and when my sister was home to bring her with me as well. Naturally, I told her I would do both. That punch in the stomach was because... I lied. I didn't go and visit... and I didn't take Stephanie to see her when she was home in September. All I can think about is how many times she mentioned me coming to visit, and how many opportunities I never took. The sad thing is, if I wanted it to be, her house is on my way home. Some of you are probably wondering why I'm admitting this to you... well, it's part of my process. You see, as a writer I hold certain convictions that I will not only hold others accountable for the lessons God gives me, but also to hold myself accountable. In the last few weeks I have been spending a lot of time writing and talking about being intentional about being relational. I've missed the mark in a huge way. I realize that I'm not perfect, and there's no way that I can give the right amount of time to each and every relationship in my life. However, I also realize how selfish I've been lately. There's been numerous times in the last two months (and more) that I have taken the afternoon off early, and I could have easily gone to visit Mammaw. Instead I was too focused on spending time at home, at the church goofing around, or with someone that there was an interest in. I was being selfish, because those things satisfied me... and yet, I was talking to other people about being selfless...
I want to make sure everyone understands I'm not looking for sympathy through this... I'm seeking accountability. My life needs some prioritizing in order to be sure that I don't miss opportunities to tell those that I love, how much I really care. I'd like to say that it's only because I was busy, and that if there were more hours in the day I would have made it over there... but I can't say that with 100% confidence that it's true. I do know that things need to change, that I need to make more of an effort to spend time with my family, all of my family. I am at a loss for emotion at this point, minus the anger and hope. I text a brother of mine and told him what I was struggling with, the guilt and the anger.. and told him why. His response was this: "Ask the Lord for forgiveness, repent, do better. I'll pray for peace brother". It's as simple as that friends, I need to ask God for forgiveness for my selfish nature, repent from that, and do better. Do better. Two words that carry a whole lot of weight with them. I'm tired of being mediocre, and I'm tired of being selfish. It's time for me.. to do better.
Grace and Peace
10.30.2012
A man of God, not of this world
I have been thinking a lot about what it means to be a man. By that I mean, I've been thinking about what it means to be a man after God's own heart. I'll be honest, I'm often better at being a man of this world, than a man of God. Being a man of God is much more difficult because it requires obedience, reverence, surrender, and sacrifice. Being a man of the world is easy, it requires an ego, pride, selfishness, and foolishness... all which come pretty easily to us men. However, I also realize that what I gain by striving to be a man of God is exponentially greater than what I gain from the world. Over the last two days my thoughts about Godly manhood have been running rampant... and I've realized that there are a few key things that are crucial to my development as a Godly man:
A Godly man must kneel before God and pray... fervently.
There are three key words in that statement... kneel, pray, fervently. The first key word, kneel, is important because kneeling before God is an act of reverence. Now, that doesn't mean that I'm not reverent through prayer when I'm not kneeling. However, I believe that when I kneel before God I am acknowledging (in a physical way) that I am smaller than God, that I am weaker than God, and that I am in awe of God. Now, to me personally, kneeling can be rather uncomfortable-- and I find that in my discomfort, I must be more disciplined in the way that I pray. By being more disciplined in my prayers, I am able to be more transparent with God... more, vulnerable with Him. I believe that the strength and intimacy of my relationship with God is greatly impacted by my ability to be vulnerable before Him. In order to stand tall in this world, I must kneel before my God. The second key word, pray, is pretty self-explanatory. In order to truly understand who God is calling me to be, I need to open the lines of communication regularly. I don't mean that I pray every night before bed, and that covers the 24 hour period that we call a day. No, it's much bigger than that. It means I consult God throughout my day.. some days more than others.. but regardless I seek His counsel in each and every decision I am faced with, in order to be fully vested in the will of God. That third word, fervently, that's quite possibly one of the most crucial words in the above statement. My prayers absolutely CAN NOT be relaxed. In order to seek God's counsel I must pray fervently, which means I must pray with a burning, fiery, passion to know the will of God for my life. I love using the word fervently to describe how I want/need/sometimes do pray because it conveys a sense of urgency. My communication with God is urgent, because I can't do anything without Him... at least nothing that is glorifying to Him.
A Godly man must be a leader.
As I stated before.. I have been thinking a lot about what it means to be a Godly man, which has led me to thinking about the kind of man I want/need to be, which has led to thoughts of the future. I must preface this in saying that I am in no way prepared to be married, or making plans to be married anytime in the near future. However, that doesn't mean I don't think about marriage, or my role as a husband and father. Those thoughts initially tie right back into my first point about prayer. In order to be the kind of husbands God calls us to be, we have to pray for our wives. It's never to early to do that. I started praying for my wife years ago... and I don't have any idea who she is. I pray that she is growing in her relationship with Christ, that God is preparing me to be a man that can provide for and protect her, and that He is also preparing her to love me for everything I am, and everything I am not. I pray that I can be a leader for her and for my children. In order to lead, I must pray fervently. The two go hand in hand. As a man who (attempts at best) studies the Bible, I know that I will be called to be the head of my household, and a spiritual leader for my family. Now, let me clarify, that being the "head of the household" does not inherently mean that I believe I must make the most money, or that I am in some way more important than my wife. Not at all. A husband and wife are equal partners in a marriage, but I also recognize that as a man, it is my duty to provide for her, and to lead my household in the way that God calls me to do so. I must show the love of Christ to my wife and my children daily... Lord willing, that won't be a difficult task at all, because by the time that season of my life rolls around, God will have prepared me to be what they need, and He will have prepared them to love me even when I'm not. Leadership isn't just restricted to marriage and fatherhood though. I must be a leader to my fellow man.. which means I must live a life that convicts others to live a life that strives to be more Christ-like. I need to be strong in my convictions, and I need to seek counsel and accountability from those around me. In order to become a Godly man, I must lead a Godly life. That's often easier said, than done... so I'll add that to my prayers throughout the day.
A Godly man must be held accountable.
Accountability is crucial to our growth as men. Now, I get that some people think that accountability and being intentional about being relational can be... too emotional. However, if we aren't emotional, if we aren't transparent and vulnerable amongst men, how can we be those things in the presence of God? I struggled for a long time with accountability and intentional relationships with brothers in Christ. However, in the last year I have seen my accountability grow stronger, and the intent of my relationships grow deeper. If it were not for my relationships with my brothers, I would not be the man I am today. Accountability is a principal that is based on the life of Christ. Christ surrounded himself with 12 men, disciples. These 12 men were in constant community with Christ. They helped each other grow closer to Christ and to each other. What better accountability is there than to be held accountable by our very own Savior. In order to be truly convicted by the accountability that Christ holds us to, we have to be in communication with Christ and with others. It's simple logic. Surrounding ourselves with people that will help develop us into better men, better leaders, and better pray-ers (I realize that's not a word), we have to have a community of believers holding us accountable for the way we act.
A Godly man must find his self worth, in Christ alone.
Part of what inspired this post was a thought I had yesterday, that I proceeded to share with my network of social media outlets... the thought was this:
"At some point a man must realize his own self worth is measured by his obedience to Christ, not to the world.."
That's a truth that God spoke into my life yesterday in a huge way. I realized that His ways are so much better than my own, and in order to have the confidence that I am someone worth loving.. I have to realize that that is dependent on me obeying Christ's will for me life. A follow up to that thought, was this one:
"Man is not defined by his mistakes, his missteps, or his sins, rather who Man is, is defined by his salvation in Christ and the redemption he was offered by Christ's sacrifice for Man."
My obedience to Christ is how I measure my self worth. Who I am as a man, is defined by Christ's sacrifice to me. Christ gave his life so that I would be a child of God, forgiven of sin, and washed by the blood... because of that, I need to be obedient to Christ, because, well... it's the least I can do to thank Him for dying a torturous death in order that I may have life. This week, this month, this lifetime... I want to focus more on my self-worth, on my obedience to Christ... and I want to constantly be reminded, and remind others, that because of Christ's sacrifice for us, I am saved... and my salvation is what defines me, not my sin. I want to continue to grow into a Godly man-- so my focus needs to be on prayer, leadership, and finding my self-worth in Christ... Men, will you join me on this journey to become more Christ-like?
Grace and Peace
A Godly man must kneel before God and pray... fervently.
There are three key words in that statement... kneel, pray, fervently. The first key word, kneel, is important because kneeling before God is an act of reverence. Now, that doesn't mean that I'm not reverent through prayer when I'm not kneeling. However, I believe that when I kneel before God I am acknowledging (in a physical way) that I am smaller than God, that I am weaker than God, and that I am in awe of God. Now, to me personally, kneeling can be rather uncomfortable-- and I find that in my discomfort, I must be more disciplined in the way that I pray. By being more disciplined in my prayers, I am able to be more transparent with God... more, vulnerable with Him. I believe that the strength and intimacy of my relationship with God is greatly impacted by my ability to be vulnerable before Him. In order to stand tall in this world, I must kneel before my God. The second key word, pray, is pretty self-explanatory. In order to truly understand who God is calling me to be, I need to open the lines of communication regularly. I don't mean that I pray every night before bed, and that covers the 24 hour period that we call a day. No, it's much bigger than that. It means I consult God throughout my day.. some days more than others.. but regardless I seek His counsel in each and every decision I am faced with, in order to be fully vested in the will of God. That third word, fervently, that's quite possibly one of the most crucial words in the above statement. My prayers absolutely CAN NOT be relaxed. In order to seek God's counsel I must pray fervently, which means I must pray with a burning, fiery, passion to know the will of God for my life. I love using the word fervently to describe how I want/need/sometimes do pray because it conveys a sense of urgency. My communication with God is urgent, because I can't do anything without Him... at least nothing that is glorifying to Him.
A Godly man must be a leader.
As I stated before.. I have been thinking a lot about what it means to be a Godly man, which has led me to thinking about the kind of man I want/need to be, which has led to thoughts of the future. I must preface this in saying that I am in no way prepared to be married, or making plans to be married anytime in the near future. However, that doesn't mean I don't think about marriage, or my role as a husband and father. Those thoughts initially tie right back into my first point about prayer. In order to be the kind of husbands God calls us to be, we have to pray for our wives. It's never to early to do that. I started praying for my wife years ago... and I don't have any idea who she is. I pray that she is growing in her relationship with Christ, that God is preparing me to be a man that can provide for and protect her, and that He is also preparing her to love me for everything I am, and everything I am not. I pray that I can be a leader for her and for my children. In order to lead, I must pray fervently. The two go hand in hand. As a man who (attempts at best) studies the Bible, I know that I will be called to be the head of my household, and a spiritual leader for my family. Now, let me clarify, that being the "head of the household" does not inherently mean that I believe I must make the most money, or that I am in some way more important than my wife. Not at all. A husband and wife are equal partners in a marriage, but I also recognize that as a man, it is my duty to provide for her, and to lead my household in the way that God calls me to do so. I must show the love of Christ to my wife and my children daily... Lord willing, that won't be a difficult task at all, because by the time that season of my life rolls around, God will have prepared me to be what they need, and He will have prepared them to love me even when I'm not. Leadership isn't just restricted to marriage and fatherhood though. I must be a leader to my fellow man.. which means I must live a life that convicts others to live a life that strives to be more Christ-like. I need to be strong in my convictions, and I need to seek counsel and accountability from those around me. In order to become a Godly man, I must lead a Godly life. That's often easier said, than done... so I'll add that to my prayers throughout the day.
A Godly man must be held accountable.
Accountability is crucial to our growth as men. Now, I get that some people think that accountability and being intentional about being relational can be... too emotional. However, if we aren't emotional, if we aren't transparent and vulnerable amongst men, how can we be those things in the presence of God? I struggled for a long time with accountability and intentional relationships with brothers in Christ. However, in the last year I have seen my accountability grow stronger, and the intent of my relationships grow deeper. If it were not for my relationships with my brothers, I would not be the man I am today. Accountability is a principal that is based on the life of Christ. Christ surrounded himself with 12 men, disciples. These 12 men were in constant community with Christ. They helped each other grow closer to Christ and to each other. What better accountability is there than to be held accountable by our very own Savior. In order to be truly convicted by the accountability that Christ holds us to, we have to be in communication with Christ and with others. It's simple logic. Surrounding ourselves with people that will help develop us into better men, better leaders, and better pray-ers (I realize that's not a word), we have to have a community of believers holding us accountable for the way we act.
A Godly man must find his self worth, in Christ alone.
Part of what inspired this post was a thought I had yesterday, that I proceeded to share with my network of social media outlets... the thought was this:
"At some point a man must realize his own self worth is measured by his obedience to Christ, not to the world.."
That's a truth that God spoke into my life yesterday in a huge way. I realized that His ways are so much better than my own, and in order to have the confidence that I am someone worth loving.. I have to realize that that is dependent on me obeying Christ's will for me life. A follow up to that thought, was this one:
"Man is not defined by his mistakes, his missteps, or his sins, rather who Man is, is defined by his salvation in Christ and the redemption he was offered by Christ's sacrifice for Man."
My obedience to Christ is how I measure my self worth. Who I am as a man, is defined by Christ's sacrifice to me. Christ gave his life so that I would be a child of God, forgiven of sin, and washed by the blood... because of that, I need to be obedient to Christ, because, well... it's the least I can do to thank Him for dying a torturous death in order that I may have life. This week, this month, this lifetime... I want to focus more on my self-worth, on my obedience to Christ... and I want to constantly be reminded, and remind others, that because of Christ's sacrifice for us, I am saved... and my salvation is what defines me, not my sin. I want to continue to grow into a Godly man-- so my focus needs to be on prayer, leadership, and finding my self-worth in Christ... Men, will you join me on this journey to become more Christ-like?
Grace and Peace
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